|
CHAPTER
FOUR
_____________________
HELP...
Since we were forbidden to use the kitchen, it was back to Greasy’s
to dream up another plan. In about half an hour we had four pretty
good plans: (PLAN A) became brain surgeons, (PLAN B) move to
Wisconsin and hunt moose, (PLAN C) inherit millions from rich
uncle’s cat, (PLAN D) baby-sit for the Tiranesores. It was a
tough choice but in a little while we had narrowed it down to moose
hunting and baby-sitting. Since I couldn’t catch worms let
alone moose, we had to go with the baby-sitting.
Early next morning we went over to the Tiranesores
(their house was this fancy-shmancy kind of house). Mrs. Tiranesore
was there to greet us (Well I thought it was Mrs. Tiranesore it was
hard to tell she looked more like a giant chocolate bar covered in
feathers and small pieces of action figures).
She said that she would pay us fifty dollars an hour
each! Me and Eddy’s chins were on the floor dragging again. But when
we stepped in, we realized why she was paying us so much. When
we stepped in, there were kids everywhere. It looked like they
were having a mini war, fighting with everything from toad launching
catapults to bottles of chocolate syrup. We stared in horror
thinking of what they might do to us. That was until Mr. Tiranesore
stepped in cracking his whip er I mean belt. The room was dead
quiet.
The so-called children quickly cleaned up the room and
sat on the couches and all started to read The Red Badge of
Courage (Obviously to get some more battle plans)
“How many kids do you have” Eddy and I asked. “We’ve
lost count.“ they replied staring at their so-called children. They
gave us a bunch of instructions (Although a book on lion taming
would have worked).
Every thing was going pretty well until Mr. and Mrs.
Tiranesore left. After that, everyone went back to the war.
Ahh! The beautiful sight of flying toads and chocolate syrup bottles
being squeezed. “Guys, Guys !” We yelled as we stepped between
them (not a good idea unless you happen to like flying shrubbery or
partially cooked linguini).
Then, as if things couldn’t get any worse, the two
leaders said in their Murderous little voices “Lets get em!”
Obviously the little darlings wanted to play tag.
But then I miraculously had an idea. “Who wants
some lunch. ”ROAR!!!“ The screamed. I’ll take that as a yes.”
Eddy responded. “What do you Guys (Or what ever you are) usually eat
for lunch” I asked. “We aways have penubudda an choket soth wid
honey.”(Peanut-butter chocolate-sauce and honey for you non-babies)
They lied. We all know that any smart person could see that they
were lying. But as you also know Me and Eddy ain’t the brightest
bulbs in the pack. Because as you know, not only did we have
the IQ of a trout, but we also had the cooking abilities of one.
“What are we going to do with these monsters while
we’re making the sandwiches?“ “I don’t know... Hey why don’t we sit
them down in front of the TV.” We whispered back and forth. “OK
which movie do you want to watch: Barney in Pogo Land or
Teletubbies go to Paris?” Eddy asked. “Jurassic park six!” They
all pleaded. “Jurassic park six!!!” we yelled in amazement “We cant
even watch that. I don’t think your mom wants you to see it.” I’ll
save you all the whining, crying, and foot stomping (And that was
just us! You should have seen them!).
Well, finally we gave in and went into the chocolate
covered kitchen (Hey they are the Tiranesores) . “How do you think
you make peanut butter chocolate sauce and honey sandwiches? Hey why
don’t we use the blender!” I exclaimed. So that’s just what we did.
Ahh it was just like old times us throwing stuff into the open
blender and stuff flying everywhere. Of course we knew what to do we
just threw it into the microwave (Of course we had let a stray spoon
get in)
CRACKLE, CRACKLE, KASPLAT
And who would
you have guessed was outside but old Mugsy herself (Boy she really
gets around) but instead of Chile she should be in sunny Toledo in a
few minutes. We scraped up all the sandwiches, except now they were
stew.
We walked into the living room expecting to see a bunch of hungry
little monster babies, but the room was empty. We walked in a little
farther and then the door slammed shut. It was an ambush and we were
surrounded! “Attack!” yelled their leader. Eddy, without thinking,
threw the sandwiches um er I mean stew up at the ceiling fan, the
stew was flung everywhere. We saw our chance! It was time to run .
. . time to escape . . . time to slip over the chocolate stew. The
monsters lunged at us, binding us up with everything from silly
string to jump ropes. I got lucky. They only tied me to a chair.
Poor Eddy, on the other hand, was tied to a nearby ceiling fan (The
one he launched the stew off with).
And then to our horror, one of the things found the
spare key to the front door. They all piled out, but not without a
sinister “Mwa hahahaha !” Fortunately monsters aren’t very good with
knots so I escaped with ease, but it wasn’t so easy for Eddy (I
guess spinning around on a ceiling fan makes untying knots kind of
hard to do). And we even managed to catch a few of the monster
babies and secure them safely in their playpen (The fact that it was
upside-down with the piano on top made it a wee bit safer). We knew
we had to find those babies, but we didn’t know where to look, until
a stampede of elephants came by. “Uh oh we’re in big trouble.” We
said at the same time. |
